The End of Sar Shalom

There are no sects in geometry.
- François-Marie Arouet (Voltaire)

(Here is another blog essay I have had in draft form since January.)

Under God's guidance I led a Messianic Jewish congregation named P'nei Adonai from March 2004 until July 2007, when it merged with a second congregation named Sar Shalom.

At that time I became almost free of ministry responsibilities, which was quite providential so I could care for my wife during a difficult pregnancy and then adjust to my new role as househusband.

The non-profit named P'nei Adonai remains, but its purpose (and website) changed. The ministry is no longer a congregation. Instead, we teach local churches what we learned about Yeshua's first-century worship and worldview.

My family was part of Sar Shalom since the merge, but not always actively since the pregnancy and new baby, combined with my wife's extreme gluten intolerance, often made participation difficult.

In December 2008 my family left for a three week vacation to visit family. When we returned, Sar Shalom was no longer a congregation.

I have already blogged about some of the struggles and tensions that Sar Shalom faced during the twenty months of its existence. This essay will attempt to weave these pieces into a coherent whole so that others can learn from our experiences.

Let's begin with an institutional autopsy. A congregation can be "killed" in several different ways. Looking back, what happened to Sar Shalom?

Some congregations have a weak or abandoned vision. This was most of Sar Shalom's problem, as will be discussed soon.

Some congregations go bankrupt, but a lack of finances was never a problem for Sar Shalom. God provides for the work he has called his people to do, and Sar Shalom was deeply used by God.

Some congregations suffer a split, which was part of the problem at Sar Shalom. Usually a split happens when a group grows too large for its number of skilled leaders. At Sar Shalom a small split happened when a lack of clear congregational vision allowed a few families to be drawn into strange doctrine. These left the main group to worship together.

So the core problem was about the group's vision. Sar Shalom never had a focused vision, and without one could not withstand the stresses inherent in being so used by God. Families left, one by one, for a plethora of reasons.

Would enough families have stayed if the group's vision had been more focused, clearer, and held aloft more brightly? Perhaps. But had that been true, many of those families would not have ever joined.

The congregation fractured along four fault lines.

First, a Messianic Jewish congregation must know if it is a modernized first-century community or a transformed Rabbinic community. Sar Shalom was never sure, and this caused many families to always feel the group was slightly unstable.

Second (and probably most significantly), congregants must value having community. Over half those who attended Sar Shalom, when it was at its largest, were of families that had previously become dissatisfied with "the church", had left it, and had for several months or years been trying follow Yeshua as an isolated family. This is contrary to scripture, which states that the whole reason we are left on earth after joining the Kingdom of God is to form close-knit communities that demonstrate God's ways to all of heaven and earth. (Consider how often Paul uses the metaphor of community members are parts of a body!) But these congregants, having grown used to religious life apart from a congregation, easily returned to that model when congregational or inter-personal issues became stressful. How different from the perspective developed in a Jewish upbringing, which cannot imagine being Jewish apart from a Jewish community and expects (and braces for) the community to experience both the joys and tears of a large family.

Third, one member was secretly and actively planting division. She followed Ephraimite theology and convinced three other families to join her "camp" within the congregation. When the Autumn holy days arrived they left without saying farewell, intent to do things their way and not understanding that the community could have grown in wisdom and remained united if challenged to process the doctrinal differences together. Because Sar Shalom was small everyone had volunteer roles to help Shabbat services happen, and the three families that left were among those that did the most: the simultaneous loss of these families confused and temporarily crippled our weekly services.

Finally, the Messianic Jewish Vision understands that God is refining his people in preparation for the Messiah reigning on earth. Many at Sar Shalom were not willing to go through that refining. These left when they saw personal and painful refining happen within the congregation in Spring and Summer 2008 (even if they were not the ones being refined). Or they left during the many structural changes preceding Rosh Hashanah of 2008, or a few weeks later when Sar Shalom was used by God to do refining within another congregation.

During the years that I led the local Messianic Jewish congregation, I cast a focused vision and the group stayed small. Sar Shalom's leader attempted to create a more vaguely defined and welcoming community; it did grow large because it was more welcoming, but it also faded quickly because it was more vague.

Back in July 2008 I was pleased with the merge because I knew, through my own prayers, that its leader was called by God to his leadership role. The shutting down of Sar Shalom means one of two things.

One option is that God intended Sar Shalom to thrive but its leadership did not lead as God intended. I do not think this is true, but I will never know for sure. (It would be horribly rude for God to tell me!)

The other option is that Sar Shalom was destined to fail. This makes more sense to me. The twenty months of Sar Shalom's existence proved that in this location a welcoming and vaguely defined Messianic Jewish community cannot endure, for the reasons detailed above. In this place there is too much:

1. tension between Jewish identity through first-century or Rabbinic Judaism
2. readiness to leave the community rather than grow through family-like stresses
3. abundance of harmful doctrines that are seductive to Gentiles who love Torah
4. common human tendency to avoid situations intense enough to cause refining
   

Seeing this proved was valuable, for many people in this area longed for such a congregation and only now can rest knowing their dream is currently unobtainable.

Or perhaps what was really longed for, during the years when P'nei Adonai kept its focus and stayed small, was a place where people could either rest comfortably or shape the community to be what they wished. But the Messianic Jewish Vision has no place for resting comfortably, nor for leaders who are not leading by following God's specific instructions. Power from the Kingdom of God only comes to those whose authority is based on obeying God.

Currently Sar Shalom's leader and his family are enjoying some rest and recovery after being drained by holding up Sar Shalom. I have been greatly encouraged as I have seen this leader's growth in humility and patience during the past two years, and am sure that God has more plans for this man and his family.

Many families, including mine, are praying about what to do next. During the months of sunshine we have a nice park-like place near one family's home which is an obvious location where to gather informally to welcome Shabbat or celebrate Havdalah. I pray with eager expectation for what will be the next more-permanent development: there are many options but God has not yet favored one or revealed a hidden alternative.

UPDATE: In early August 2009 I heard from one of the "three families that left".

They claimed they did say farewell. This may well be true. However, the other congregational leader did not perceive this, and rudeness is in the eye of the receiver.

They claimed they were not "intent to do things their way" and left because of extremely hurt feelings from interpersonal issues (rather than a hesitancy to process doctrinal differences, as I wrote about). I must trust this account. Again, any rudeness they felt was real in their eyes.

In retrospect it is easy to see that the congregational leadership (which to some extent included myself) should have been doing more to bring more peace to interpersonal relationships among congregants. I can only apologize and say that I tried to do what it seemed I could do.