Sunday, January 25, 2009

Emotional Affair

A few years ago I remember reading about a Catholic cardinal who coined the phrase "emotional adultery". Unfortunately I cannot now locate his name or provide a link.

He had written a book making the assertion that a spouses should be each other's best friends and closest confidants. If a married person ever felt emotionally closer to someone other than his or her spouse that was a warning sign indicating that the marriage relationship needed more time and effort.

One of his most controversial points was that the gender of the "third" person did not matter. A husband who is most comfortable talking about his private life with a male friend at work or at the gym is still committing "emotional adultery" by replacing what should be in the marriage relationship.

This has always seemed good advice to me. My wife and I do follow it. We have friends, but make sure we are always each other's best friend.

Anyway, the phrase "emotional affair" recently popped up in a discussion on Ace's blog. I'm writing this to chip in there.

If anyone knows the name of that cardinal, please remind me!

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